
Announcing the Attachment Mix Tape! Track #1: "The Glory of Love"
I just watched the movie Beaches starring Bette Midler and Barbara Hershey for the first time in a decade! If you’ve never seen it, its probably one of the sweetest and most sad films made about long-term friendship ever made, but so poignant and a beautiful example of love and commitment and adult attachment. After watching the film again, I became a little obsessed with one of the songs in the film performed by Bette Midler at the end called “The Glory of Love”. My therap

"Your task is not to seek for love...."
This past week I volunteered at a conference for psychotherapists learning the model of couples therapy I practice called Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT). I attended this same 4 day conference approximately 2 years ago when I was learning the model for the first time, and it drastically changed (for the better!) the way I understand couples relationships, as well as how I understand myself and my relationship with my husband. It was really nice to be a volunteer at

"You scowl because you have indigestion and fourteen people feel inadequate."
As a couples therapist, the question of “fault” comes up quite frequently. Couples in distress are typically wondering – which one of us is “the problem”? Who caused the last fight we had? Much energy is spent either blaming oneself and feeling terrible or blaming one’s partner and feeling angry and hopeless. In Buddhist psychology, the concept of “no self” is something I have found both liberating and confusing, but one piece of this concept that can be readily observed

"To love without knowing how to love wounds the person we love" - Thich Nhat Hanh
It’s been far too long since I’ve posted here! I was inspired to start writing again by a disturbing but very educational experience I had recently. A few weeks ago, I attended a conference for psychotherapists to learn a model of therapy called Functional Analytic Psychotherapy. I was expecting it to be a typical conference where there are a series of presentations with me taking notes – like a big classroom. Instead, it turned out to be a VERY experiential conference with